6 steps to identify your core values
I’ve been talking about the importance of identifying your core values A LOT (#sorrynotsorry). See this post, and this post, and this post, and all over Instagram. 😄 But when I think back to the time in my life when I was not solid in my own values, I was a hot mess.
I was in relationships with people who did not hold similar values (as I know them now) or even respect them - and guess what? They were toxic as hell.
I would let the opinions of others sway me into making decisions that I totally came to regret later.
I was afraid to contradict anyone for fear of not being liked, so I kept quiet, and I consumed a lot of alcohol to cope and to seem like the wild, care-free friend.
And the list goes on.
Identifying my values is one of the personal development exercises I am most grateful for because the outcome is a confident, joyful woman who marches to the beat of her own drum and doesn’t give a f*ck anymore.
And, omg, breaking news! People still like me! (maybe less people, but the RIGHT people)
Now that I have touted the importance of identifying your values AGAIN, let’s talk about how we go about it, shall we?
Step 1: Acknowledge a desire to stand in your personal truth
You might notice that you don’t feel confident, that your choices aren’t yours, or that you are uncomfortable being vulnerable or open to others. Maybe these observations don’t feel good to you and you decide that you are ready to take your power back.
Step 2: Dig deep to uncover your truth
Journal on memories where you felt proud and fulfilled. Also think about events where you didn’t feel good about what was going on around you. These memories will trigger emotions that will help you give names to your values.
Step 3: Write down your core values
Just as it says, write them down! If you need help putting names to values, you can check out this list of 150 values I put together to get you started. Choose several that resonate with you.
Step 4: Group and prioritize the values you chose
Sometimes we pick multiple values that have the same essence or mean roughly the same thing. Put any similar values together, narrow your list down, and then list them in order of priority. Please remember that there are no right or wrong answers, only what is true for you!
Step 5: Reaffirm your values
After sleeping on it, think about whether or not each of these values still resonate with you. Look at each value and make sure that it still resonates. It’s never too late to make changes - in fact, values might evolve as you evolve!
Step 6: Stand in your personal truth
Now that you have identified your values, it’s time to take an audit of your life and ask yourself, “What aligns with my core values?”, “What doesn’t?” Prioritize what aligns and ditch what doesn’t.
I went through this process by myself and it was long and it was messy (I’m talking years of self-discovery), but it doesn’t have to be! That’s why I put together a guide to help you accomplish steps 1 - 5 in 3-days (give or take, it’s not a perfect science!) with my free 3-day challenge. This course will have all the reflection prompts you need, a list of values to use for reference, and tips to make this an efficient, yet meaningful exercise.
Step 6, however, is an entirely separate process that will likely take months or years. It will evolve as you evolve. It is an active practice of always, always, ALWAYS, coming back to the core values you identified, and deprioritizing the rest.
If you need help with this process, you can book a free mini-coaching session with me.
